Director JJ Abrams Immortalises the River Cafe in 520 Pieces of Virtual Lego

Do not scratch your eyes — this is a virtual lego rendering of London institution the River Cafe, put together by Star Wars film director JJ Abrams.

In a mail-out to its faithfuls, the Hammersmith Italian restaurant founded by Ruth Rogers and the late Rose Gray in 1987 revealed that Abrams, best-known for Super 8 and Star Wars sequels The Force Awakens and The Rise of Skywalker, had a “regular” table when “directing Star Wars in London.” Lucky lad.

That fandom resulted in this 520 “piece” virtual Lego rendering of the Italian restaurant, complete with a Ruth Rogers figurine wielding what looks like a lobster and the instantly recognisable fuchsia wood oven tended to by a Lego chef. One well-regarded London chef who preferred to remain anonymous said via WhatsApp, “take my money.”

The River Cafe opened its email with word that Abrams “has been saying for months that he was creating something special for us,” ruminating on whether it might have been, like, a film. Him being a director. But lo, special this certainly is, as the best/worst restaurant merch of 2020 arrives just in time for Christmas — London restaurant stans can only hope that Lego is brave enough to put it into full production.